Friday, February 11, 2011

"Please don't make me cry."

I have been nothing but a big ball of emotions lately. I'm sure some of it can be attributed to PMS, but it's more than the average hormonal imbalance. A few people reading this can probably testify to that. I've professed my love for more people in the past few days than I probably have in the past few months, I cried because I was heart broken for someone else, I cried because I saw something cheesy on TV, (I should interject and say that it doesn't take much to make me cry in general, but it has been ridiculous lately.) I've gotten uber warm fuzzies over cute animal pictures on Tumblr like this, this and this... Basically, I've been out of control.

Oh, I also literally spent HOURS the other night trying to make a gif of Lor eating a Koala Yummy. Nothing was working and it was late in the night, so I kind of gave up and went to bed. The next day I took what I made on Windows Movie Maker and uploaded it to YouTube, that way she could at least see how it would look if the gif worked. Then, a moment of genius. I took that video and uploaded it to GifSoup, and VOILA! A gif! I was so excited that I gasped, my heart was racing. and I had a gigantic cheesy grin consuming my entire face. (See, it's not all sad emotions!) My hours of hard work had finally payed off!

Sheer awesomeness.

Then my mom decides to pull some crap tonight and tell me this story:

She and my dad (and baby me) had a cat, Nicky, when they lived in Oklahoma. The cat ended up dying right before they moved back to Michigan. The day they moved our dog Butch went missing, but my dad eventually found him in the back yard where they had buried the cat, crying.

I jokingly over-exaggerated my cries and we all laughed, but I actually had real tears in my eyes. That was one of the sweetest stories ever. He was such a good dog.

So, is this just me, or has anyone else been overly emotional lately?

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Day 20 – A song that you listen to when you’re angry:
Finally, a question a have a definite answer for!

I adore the band Trapt. Great music, great lyrics, and Chris Brown (what an unfortunate name) has such a sexy voice! Their song, Hollowman, is the PERFECT song to belt out when you really feel like injuring someone. I couldn't begin to count how many times I have driven around, song blaring, aggressively singing my little heart out. So therapeutic! ☺

"I don't ever want to see, I don't ever want to be like you, Hollowman."

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

"I'm just beginning. The pen's in my hand, ending unplanned."

I was over at the Tsaritsa sez the other day and came across this really cool handwriting meme. I thought maybe I'd end up doing it myself and, low and behold, Apfel tagged me in her own post! I don't know why I'm so excited about this, but what can I say? I'm a big nerd. Whatever.

Anyway, these were the questions I had to answer.

1. What's your name/your Blogger name?
2. What's your blog's name/URL?
3. Write "the quick fox jumps over the lazy dog"
4. Favorite quote?
5. Your favorite song?
6. Your favorite band/singers?
7. Anything else you want to say?
8. Tag 3-5 other people.

As if my handwriting isn't sucky enough, the picture had to be blurry too. Sorry.

Tagged: Kaylee
              Victoria (For the love of everything holy, DO NOT call her Vicki!)

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Day 19 – A song from your favorite album:

Picking a favorite album is just as hard for me as picking a favorite song. There are SO many good ones. If I HAVE to pick, though, I'd probably say Fiona Apple's Tidal. That CD kind of began my obsession with "good" music. My favorite song from the album, and possibly just my favorite Fiona song in general, is Never is a Promise. It's only real contender for all time favorite Fiona song would be Love Ridden. We'll just call it a tie.☺

Saturday, February 5, 2011

"We'll cut out bodies free from the tethers of this scene, start a brand new colony."

I've really been trying to come up with something interesting to blog about over the past few days. Any time something strikes me (usually something that annoys me) I think "Oh man, I have to remember to blog about this!" And then I don't. I don't know, it just hasn't felt right. Then I got a text tonight from someone (we'll call her Friend #1) and it annoyed the crap out of me. I was all set to blog about what set me off, along with what I consider proper text etiquette. Friend #1 was coming over to watch a movie and I literally kept thinking to myself how badly I wanted the night to be over so I could blog about her annoying texting ways. Shortly after she arrived, I received a text from someone else (Friend #2). I felt kind of like a jerk for texting Friend #2 while Friend #1 was being entertained annoyed by the little sister, but frankly, Friend #2 was more important to me at the moment.

Friend #2 and I have connected lately over some similar life experiences and I really treasure the talks we have. It's nice to know that you're not alone in your struggles.

God has blessed me with this unexpected friendship. We are separated by so much, but are connected by much more; connected by spiritual things that mean more than the physical separation. After the chat tonight, I kind of came to a realization. The more I thought about this blessing, I realized how much I truly take for granted on a daily basis. I focus on so many trivial things, things that most likely wouldn't get to me as badly if I didn't put so much energy into stewing over them. These things are meaningless in the long run, and if I spent more time appreciating the blessings I've been given (no matter how big or small) I'd be a much happier person. Now that's not to say that I wouldn't face trials, that I wouldn't have my down times, but I'm almost creating these bad days for myself. It's like I have some sick desire to be grumpy all the time and it's becoming quite exhausting. I don't want to be that person. I want to be the carefree, less bitter person I used to be. I want to be happy because a friend is excited to talk to me, not get pissy because they don't follow some unwritten text rule that I've written.

I just want to be better.

I've kind of begun the journey already, and some recent events have led me to believe that I'm on the right path. I feel like I'm being tested, and I can't help but think that Satan wouldn't feel the need to butt his nose in if I wasn't resisting him more than in the past.

SO. If you see me being a major downer or grump or whatever, feel free to tell me what's up. Criticism, of any kind, is always welcome. It's too easy to get caught up in myself. Outsiders' perspectives are necessary.

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Day 18 – A song that you wish you heard on the radio:

I'm a bit of a music snob. I get mad when a band I hold near and dear ends up getting a lot of radio play. I feel like people should have to do the work to fully appreciate music. Talk to friends who have similar musical tastes, research on Pandora or Grooveshark or something of the like, dig through your parents' old albums... Something, anything, other than having the Top 40 channels shove songs down your throat. I tend to think that a lot of people only like certain bands/songs because they're essentially being told to like them.

"Listen to this song we play 500 times a day! It's great!"
"Oh, you know what? It really isn't that bad!"

I'm not saying that musicians don't deserve recognition and lots of money for the hard work they put in, but I think people would be less bored with music in general if they had a greater personal investment in it.

I honestly do not have an answer for this question so I'll just leave you with a song that I'm currently listening to. But go. Find some new music. Music you can get excited over. You won't regret it.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

"This town is made of aluminum, this town is made of glass."

You know when you hear a song and immediately decide that nothing else will ever top it? No? Just me? Anyway, I think I just died a little. 

I was checking out some tunes on Play Me Like You Mean It and my life was officially changed for the better (Too dramatic? Too bad.) when I came across this gem. I don't know how to describe the feeling that came over me, other than it made me feel everything and nothing all at the same time. I might even consider it existential if I didn't already know the meaning of life. I can connect with a song over the lyrics, but it's generally the feeling a song gives me that makes me go crazy for it. This one made me so crazy that I eventually became sane.

What are some songs that make you feel this way?

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

"Some days it don't come at all, and these are the days that never end."

I still haven't been to bed. I should probably get on that...

Mom: He kind of looks like Meatloaf.
Me: He kind of looks like there's another version of himself, the real version, and he's just a caricature of himself.

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Day 17 – A song that you hear often on the radio:
So, is this supposed to be a song that I hate or a song that I love? Eh, either way I don't often listen to the radio. Probably the time I listen to it the most is on the way to and from church. Naturally, we have the radio on one of two decent Christian stations that come in in our podunk town. This is one song that comes on fairly frequently, one that I never tire of. We sang it during our church's Christmas Eve service and it was one of the most emotional moments I've ever been a part of. (Third in line only to literally watching two family members die of cancer.) There wasn't a dry eye in the place, people literally reaching out to God. Thirty people dedicated their lives to Christ that night. The atmosphere was indescribable, but I'll never forget how I felt. How close to God I felt.